Am I a Woman or a Scientist?
admin February 7th, 2008
Things that I notice, but maybe I shouldn’t
1. We frequently have visitors to our lab. We know who the important ones are because my advisor makes them up a schedule that usually includes each one of the group members talking to the visitor for about 15 minutes about our (published) work. I have also been asked to show various visitors around, take pictures, etc. Almost every time I introduce myself or am introduced as a PhD candidate, they react with what seems to be both enthusiasm and surprise. Now, this might be very normal. This might happen to all the other students these visitors meet. Maybe they are always surprised at finding PhD students in a research lab. Somehow, I don’t think so. So I am left wondering what it is about me that makes them so surprised. Is it because I am a woman? Do I look exceptionally young? Is it because I am in the severe American minority in our group? I used to never identify myself as a woman, or American, scientist. But now that I am in a minority I find myself doing this all the time and I have to wonder if I was just incredibly naïve before, or am I aligning myself across divisions that aren’t really there?
2. Every few months we have a lunch to celebrate good news, invite new members to the group, and say goodbye to departing ones. Personal information about various group members is also mentioned. Recently we had a lunch in which two male members were mentioned because they were happy to have their wives coming over from their home country. We have also had celebrations of new marriages, and a mention of one male member’s pregnant wife. I think this is great as it gives our rather large group a little appreciation of the alternate lives our members lead. So, I have to say that I was a little disappointed when mentions of people’s wives flying over were made, but nothing was said about my pregnancy. Maybe my advisor was trying to be discrete (though everyone knows) or maybe he thinks that I will find it too personal for him to bring up in that way. Those are both completely valid reasons. Still, I can’t help feeling that I am just not as important, or respected, or cared about than many other members in this group. If he can bring up a male member’s upcoming parenting status, why can’t he congratulate me on mine? Maybe I am just making something into a whole lot of nothing, but little things like this get to me.